Monday, January 14, 2013

The Birth

I can still remember clearly what happened that night.
I was watching The Prestige with my husband at home until the clock struck ten. I felt a sudden wave on my back, it felt more like a pulse. I ignored it and continued watching. The waves came and went constantly and I noticed they came every 15 minutes. I thought it could possibly a sign of labor. I'd also been experiencing constant diarrhea and occasional vomiting during the past few days- which were also the signs of labor approaching as the body cleaned out in preparation for the birth. Well you don't want stools coming out while you were pushing during the delivery, do you?
I was worried and my husband called the hospital. I was asked if my abdomen felt hard. I didn't feel anything and focused more on my back so I said no. The nurse on the other end replied that in that case, it wasn't labor. So we hung up the phone and went to bed.

I couldn't sleep as I felt the waves were getting stronger and more frequent. At one in the morning I woke my husband up and we headed down to the hospital. Upon arriving I was checked and the waves were actually contractions! I'm in labor! I was planning for a caesarean section so we scheduled one at 7 in the morning. I was feeling nervous and excited as I got to see my baby soon! It was way sooner than expected! Then there came the bad news : my obgyn went overseas.  I was prepared for this kind of situation and chose my second choice of obgyn. Oh well he's not available too. Then I chose blindly whatever obgyn is available. They gave me Dr. Hendra who lived near the hospital and also available. Ok I didn't mind. 

I was put on IV transfusions and given medicine to reduce the pain of contractions. I didn't feel any pain at that time but okay. Gradually the pain was getting worse and came every five minutes. I was in pain and asked for more medicine. They gave me some through the rectum OMG they didn't promise that it would ease the pain but let's hope it would. I was in so much pain I didn't mind - it hurt! Unfortunately the medicine didn't help at all and I found myself screaming at the top of my lungs. I cried for help and the nurses tried to calm me down by teaching me how to breathe. The breathing technique DIDN'T HELP! The nurses called the obgyn and re-scheduled the c-section to 5 in the morning. I kept staring at the clock while screaming in pain (I know it's shameful but I couldn't stand the pain). It was like hell and the pain was nothing like I'd experienced before. It was like the baby tried to rip open by back.

Some minutes before 5 o clock some nurses came and moved me to another room. I was so glad to see some help coming. They moved me to the surgery room. I embraced the room with great relief. I didn't feel nervous at all. The lights were bright and I met my obgyn and quickly put under anesthesia. I felt my lower part of the body numb. The obgyn was talking to me and cracking jokes while they tore my belly open (at that time I didn't realize they were already doing it). Then the obgyn said to me "Here we go, we're ready to get the baby out. Hubby wanna record the whole thing?". My husband said yes and moved out of my sight to get the whole thing recorded. I swore I would never watch the recording - blood makes me sick. Then suddenly I heard it! I heard the baby cried. It started weakly and got stronger. I've felt so much joy and was really glad that he's healthy by the sound of his cries. The doctor confirmed it was a boy. They cleaned the baby for a minute and they put my little one on my chest. Despite the weird looking baby (seriously he was looking weird at that time), I felt so much love to see him. We took pictures and the baby was taken away to be properly cleaned and checked (The APGAR test). He weighed 3.09kg and 52cm long. He's perfectly healthy!

It was one of the most beautiful moments in my life indeed. Welcome Owen Tjahjono, our first son :)




Thursday, August 2, 2012

Married with Children

Life has been so good to me. I've never felt this grateful in my life. I fell in love with a guy I'd never thought I'd end up with and married him. And now I'm blessed with a kid on the way :) Yes, I'm pregnant and I'm so happy about it. 

When the happy news broke, people around me started to congratulate me - and guess what, some of them gave some head-ups about what I was going to go through. They're things like :
"Are you really ready for motherhood?"
"I don't want to have a kid for the first two or three years after our marriage. I want to have fun with my husband, traveling around the world, you know, to see what's out there - and you can't do that anymore when you have a kid"
"Be prepared , the kid will change your world." I asked her if it was going to be a better or worse change and she replied "Well, it depends on you."
"It ain't as easy as you think, taking care of a baby. I was so depressed I'm afraid to be pregnant again" 
"It's never going to be about you anymore - everything you do will be just about the baby."

Oh it's not just about the baby - but the husband too. My husband is a really good man. He's so loving and caring, he's always there and always all ears when I need to vent - he's really listening and giving some advices. He's everything I want from a man. He's the type of a man I thought had never existed in this universe. Some people said :
"Aaww your husband is so sweet, he really cares about you - Our  marriage was like that too"
"Enjoy your husband's love and attention while they last for they won't last long."
or in Indonesian : "Ahh masi awal2 nikah ya gitu, ntar liat la lama2 jg engga gt lagi"
And I went "WTH?" 

I got to admit, it scared me a bit. What the hell is going to happen when the baby is born? Why the hell did they sound like having a kid is a bad idea? But I know they love their kids. I asked my mom and she said that she'd never had that kind of thought. She said that having me was one of the happiest things in her life and I'm pretty sure my mom wasn't lying.
I read lots of articles on the internet about the postpartum depression or the baby blues, not to mention the fussy crying babies, the sleepless nights and so many more. I still think maybe I can do it for I love this baby so much. I think, it won't matter after all right? It's my own kid and I truly love him. Whatever it is, it's gonna be worth the sleepless and restless nights :)
And the husband.. Well, I don't know about what the future holds but I've got a good faith in him.

I hope I can be a good mom and a good wife. Oh, the baby just kicked! :) :)

Friday, December 2, 2011

Thoughts on Wedding #4 - Honeymoon Where?

Our wedding is in less than three months and I don't know where on this earth to go for  the honeymoon. Should I be freaking out by now? Oh I don't know. I think I'm easily freaked out about so many things at this moment.

Initially I had this idea of going to Europe. Yes, everybody is going to Europe for their honeymoon.  I don't care. I still want to go there. I've been dreaming about going to Italy for so long. Well, actually since last year. Since the day I read The Broker by John Grisham (a thriller novel but Grisham really painted a really beautiful imagery on this book about Italy) and  I was mad about Italian football on last World Cup (yes, the one and only Fabio Cannavaro! RAWR). I was so in love with Italy and learned a little of Italian. Now the books are already covered in dust. But still, I want to go to Italy.
I've been dreaming of being greeted "Buon giorno!" every morning by the locals, conversing with them a little, well you know, putting my Italian into practice. Then we'll be having a really good croissant alla cremma con un caffe. The weather would be cloudy and a bit cold, I and my new husband would be hand in hand, staring at each others' eyes, all smiles - just like those happy commercials on TV. I want to go to Le Cinque Terre, Piazza del Duomo, The Capri Island, Venice, Milan, Il Colosseo in Rome and so many more. We'll be having the greatest pastas and pizzas there - I don't care if I gain weight. Oh and the gelato too! The dream I had was so beautiful.

Until several friends of mine told different stories about Italy - that it was full of pickpocketing, scammers, rude people, etc. The city is dirty and it's really unsafe to go there. Going there with a group is safer, even though there's no guarantee. The thing is, there is no group going there in early March. I don't want to delay the honeymoon just in case I get knocked up early.
One of my best friends just came back from her honeymoon. She went to Spain, Italy and France. Well she wouldn't recommend me going there for the honeymoon. The crisis in Europe had begun to rise and the unemployment is expected to rise. Thus, the criminal rates also is. Puff! and jut like that Europe was crossed off of the honeymoon list. *sobs*



Andry wants to go to Maldives or Japan.
I want to go to Germany, Switzerland or UK. 

How are we going to decide?
 

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